Let's settle this once and for all: DC vs. Marvel Tournament

Fantastic Four (2005) > The Incredibles (2004)

Penalty vote to Constantine for blasphemy.

Put the pipe down.

THE FINAL VOTE:
Constantine
I have a soft spot for both of these movies.  The Tim Story Fantastic Four movies were favorite movies of my niece when she was growing up, so I have fond memories of watching them with her.  I thought Constantine was a very cool movie back in 2005, and I think it's a cool movie now.  Granted, I knew very little about Hellblazer when it came out, but while I understand the nitpicks, I think the whole is very strong with minor weaknesses that keep it from greatness.  While I consider Fantastic Four a childishly fun movie, I consider Constantine a genuinely good movie, which wins the vote.

The Score
Constantine:  6
Fantastic Four:  5



With a wave of his hand, John Constantine opens a portal that sends the Fantastic Four straight to hell. Johnny is happy down there, because even in hell, he still is the hottest thing there.

DC:  8
Marvel:  10
Draw:  1

ROUND 20!

IN THIS CORNER


Superheroes:  Christian Bale as Bruce Wayne/Batman, Michael Caine as Alfred Pennyworth
Supervillains:  Liam Neeson as Henri Ducard/Ra's al Ghul, Cillian Murphy as Johnathan Crane/Scarecrow, Tom Wilkinson as Carmine Falcone, Ken Watanabe as some dude
Civilians:  Katie Holmes as Rachel Dawes, Gary Oldman as Commissioner James Gordon, Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox
Run Time:  2 Hours 20 Minutes
Director:  Christopher Nolan (Memento, Inception, Dunkirk, Tenet...eventually)
Writer:  David S. Goyer (Blade, Blade II, Blade:  Trinity), Christopher Nolan (Memento, Inception, Dunkirk)
Music:  Hans Zimmer (The Lion King, Rain Man, Gladiator, Inception), James Newton Howard (Pretty Woman, The Fugitive, Space Jam, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them)
Cinematography:  Wally Pfister (Memento, Inception, The Italian Job)
Tomatometer:  84%
IMDB:  8.2
Oscars Nominated:  Best Achievement in Cinematography
Razzies Nominated:  Worst Supporting Actress - Katie Holmes
Story:  After his parents are murdered on the streets of Gotham, billionaire Bruce Wayne grows to realize how corrupt his home city is.  Doing some soul searching abroad, Bruce is taken in by a man named Henri Ducard, who enlists him into a mysterious group known as the League of Shadows, who train Bruce in all forms of martial arts and how to be the master of the shadows.  When Bruce learns that the League and it's leader, Ra's al Ghul, believe Gotham to be too far gone and intend to destroy it, Bruce betrays the League and returns home, donning a mask to become the city's protector, Batman, vowing to redeem the city from within and protect it from threats on the outside.

Pros:  Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Hate Batman Returns.
Cons:  Doomsday can't get in here fast enough to stick it to Nolan by supporting his best friend Brett Ratner.

AND IN THIS CORNER


Superheroes:  Patrick Stewart as Professor Charles Xavier, Hugh Jackman as Logan/Wolverine, Halle Berry as Ororo Munroe/Storm, Kelsey Grammer as Dr. Hank McCoy/Beast, Shawn Ashmore as Bobby Drake/Iceman, Anna Paquin as Marie/Rogue, Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde, Daniel Cudmore as Peter Rasputin/Colossus, James Marsden as Scott Summers/Cyclops, Ben Foster as Warren Worthington III
Supervillains:  Ian McKellan as Erik Lehnsherr/Magneto, Famke Jensen as Jean Grey/Phoenix, Rebecca Romijn as Mystique, Vinnie Jones as Cain Marko/Juggernaut, Aaron Stanford as John Allerdyce/Pyro, Dania Ramirez as Callisto
Civilians:  Michael Murphy as Warren Worthington II, Shohreh Aghdashloo as Kavita Rao, Josef Sommer as the President, Bill Duke as Secretary Trask
Run Time:  1 Hour 44 Minutes
Director:  Sex pest Brett Ratner (Rush Hour, Red Dragon, Hercules)
Writer:  Simon Kinberg (Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Jumper, Sherlock Holmes), Zak Penn (Elektra)
Music:  John Powell (How to Train Your Dragon, The Bourne Identity, Shrek, Hancock, Solo:  A Star Wars Story)
Cinematographer:  Dante Spinotte (Heat, The Quick and the Dead, Red Dragon)
Tomatometer:  57%
IMDB:  6.7
Story:  Mutantkind finds itself divided upon the discovery of a "mutant cure," which promises to eliminate the mutant gene and turn them into normal human beings.  Magneto uses the cure as a symbol for a call-to-arms for Mutants to wage war on humanity for dominance.  The X-Men are the only thing standing in his way, but find that they might be in over their heads when Jean Grey is resurrected and out of control.

Pros:  Wasn't directed by a rapist
Cons:  Was directed by a sex pest instead.

FIGHT!

Batman Begins

The Last Stand

Batman Begins 

Begins

Batman

Begins


Also, I think Man-Thing may run away with this, guys... Gut feeling.

THE FINAL VOTE:
Batman Begins
Hot take:  X-Men:  The Last Stand sucks less than X2.  Now that I've got you all angry, Batman Begins wins because of fucking course it does.

The Score
Batman Begins:  11
X-Men:  The Last Stand:  2



I just can't with this board.

DC:  9
Marvel:  10
Draw:  1

ROUND 21!

IN THIS CORNER


Superheroes:  N/A
Supervillains:  N/A
Civilians:  Viggo Mortenson as Thomas Stall/Joeseph Cusack, Maria Bello as Edie Stall, Ed Harris as Carl Doherty, William Hurt as Richie Cusack, Ashton Holmes as Jack Stall
Run Time:  1 Hour 36 Minutes
Director:  David Cronenberg (best known for his cameo in Jason X.  He is known for nothing else.)
Writer:  Josh Olson
Music:  Howard Shore (Ed Wood, Lord of the Rings, The Silence of the Lambs, The Twilight Saga:  Eclipse, but mostly Ed Wood)
Cinematography:  Peter Suschitzky (Mars Attacks!, Krull, Red Planet, The Empire Strikes Back too I guess, but mostly the first three)
Tomatometer:  87%
IMDB:  7.4
Oscars Nominated:  Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role - William Hurt, Best Adapted Screenplay
Golden Globes Nominated:  Best Motion Picture - Drama, Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture - Drama - Maria Bello
Story:  Diner owner Tom Stall finds himself forced to defend both himself and his employees when the diner is under robbery, in which he kills the two robbers with the greatest of ease.  After becoming the town hero, he soon finds himself harassed by a man who insists that Tom is actually a Hitman named Joey Cusack and he is coaxing him out of retirement.  But as time goes on it begins to seem that Tom may indeed have a past that he doesn't remember.

Pros:  David Cronenberg hates comic book movies.  Please, nobody tell him he made one.  It's funnier this way.
Cons:  I remember almost nothing about this movie except I saw it once and it was fine.

AND IN THIS CORNER


Superheroes:  Nicolas Cage as Johnny Blaze/Ghost Rider, Sam Elliot as The Caretaker/Carter Slade/Ghost Rider
Supervillains:  Wes Bentley as Blackheart, Peter Fonda as Mephistopheles, Laurence Breuls as Gressil, Daniel Frederikson as Wallow, Mathew Wilkinson as Abigor
Civilians:  Eva Mendes as Roxanne Simpson, Donal Logue as Mack, Brett Cullen as Barton Blaze, Rebel Wilson in her greatest role ever
Run Time:  1 Hour 50 Minutes (Theatrical Cut), 2 Hours 3 Minutes (Extended Cut)
Director:  Mark Steven Johnson (Daredevil)
Writer:  Mark Steven Johnson (Daredevil)
Music:  Christopher Young (Hellraiser, Drag Me to Hell, The Grudge)
Cinematographer:  Russell Boyd (Liar Liar, Dr. Dolittle, Master and Commander:  The Far Side of the World)
Tomatometer:  26%
IMDB:  5.2
Razzies Nominated:  Worst Actor - Nicolas Cage (also for National Treasure:  Book of Secrets and Next)
Story:  Stuntman Johnny Blaze makes a deal with the devil to protect his father from dying from cancer, but when he is betrayed in the deal, Johnny finds himself stuck with the "gifts" he has been given and is forced to be on Hell's beck and call.  Many years later, Blackheart, the son of the devil, rises to find the Contract of San Veganza, which will make him an unstoppable force on Earth.  Johnny is called to become the Ghost Rider and send Blackheart back to Hell where he belongs.

Pros:  You know what, I like how they homage Carter Slade AKA original Ghost Rider/renamed Phantom Rider in this movie, even though he's an entirely unrelated character.
Cons:  Action setpieces mostly consist of Ghost Rider standing in place and pointing at people.  If you're lucky, they'll go the extra mile and have him stare at someone to death.



FIGHT!

I've only got one vote to give to a Ghost Rider movie, and it isn't this one.

A History of Violence.