thebtskink
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Post by thebtskink on Jul 5, 2015 18:56:59 GMT -5
So I'm going to be the best man at my buddy's wedding in 3 weeks.
I've done it once before, but I always try to seek out advice.
Have any of you been a best man or maid of honor? What was the best speech you heard? What's a do, and what's a don't?
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Fanible
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Post by Fanible on Jul 5, 2015 19:58:59 GMT -5
Memorize your speech, for the love of pete. It is more respectful, makes for far better presentation, the appearance of complete sincerity, and the ability to look at those whom you are supposedly talking to. You should also have plenty of time to get it down (that kinda falls into the respectful category). Okay, granted, maybe having it written on some cards as a perhaps necessary backup might be one thing. There's no harm in being prepared in case you freeze up, but I've been to a number of weddings lately where the maid/best actually have their speech on their phone, holding and reading off of it the entire time. It just seems kind of lame.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 5, 2015 20:01:33 GMT -5
We didn't do a best man speech at my wedding. Never been a best man either. No help here. Sorry.
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Doomsday
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Post by Doomsday on Jul 5, 2015 20:05:06 GMT -5
One thing to set your mind at ease; no matter how little you prepare for your speech or how bad it is, it won't be as bad as the Maid of Honor speech. Maids of Honor giving speeches is the worst thing to happen to weddings since maybe ever. They are always 100% of the time without fail, dogshit. So remember that you'll have her sure to be crap speech to help boost your ratings a bit. On the other hand though, that might put pressure on you to help save that part of the evening since her speech will be a disaster. It just depends on how you look at it.
Other than that, just prepare. I've been Best Man in several weddings and I've learned that preparing and writing it down is key. It doesn't matter if you read off a paper or memorize it when you deliver it, I've seen it done successfully both ways, just write it down beforehand so you can go over what you're saying and make sure that it flows. Make sure that any jokes or fond memories are ones that everyone can understand or relate to (as opposed to MoH speeches which always have some inside joke that nobody gets and is met with mild pity laughter). No need to mention that you shouldn't swear or speak of anything that could be uncomfortable but you'd be surprised how many Best Men think of it as their time to be amateur standup comedians and end up pissing people off. One note however is to keep it on the shorter end. My first Best Man speech killed, everyone loved it but it was 10 minutes give or take which is a long one. Granted it was my first one and I had no pointers but I think 5 minutes is enough time to do your business.
Also, if you're feeling the pressure just remember that nobody will remember your speech when the wedding is over. People don't care. The only way they'll remember is if you make a complete fool of yourself by swearing, making sex jokes or doing other stuff that's inappropriate for the occasion.
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thebtskink
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Post by thebtskink on Jul 5, 2015 20:44:56 GMT -5
Yeah I've only done it for my brother before, not a friend. I'm hoping I'm striking the right balance of humor and sincerity.
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RedStorm901
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Post by RedStorm901 on Jul 6, 2015 3:00:31 GMT -5
Good luck I was a best man in a wedding about 10 years ago but I wasn't expected to give a speech. I'm supposed to be a best man again in December, but I'm thinking a speech isn't expected this time either.
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IanTheCool
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Post by IanTheCool on Jul 7, 2015 9:49:06 GMT -5
Just make it personal. Don't get a bunch of stock lines from the internet.
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Post by RedVader on Jul 7, 2015 10:29:30 GMT -5
This is my opinion as a Best Man. Unless its being asked of you too talk by your buddy and his women. Dont and dont sleep with the brides sister or any of the bride maids if had a few drinks. And best advise yet dont arrive late and most important make sure never have dated the bride.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 7, 2015 10:54:18 GMT -5
Dont and dont sleep with the brides sister or any of the bride maids if had a few drinks. Even if they aren't on their periods?
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RedStorm901
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Post by RedStorm901 on Jul 7, 2015 11:00:44 GMT -5
Dont and dont sleep with the brides sister or any of the bride maids if had a few drinks. Even if they aren't on their periods? I got a feeling this is going to haunt Vader for a long time.
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Post by RedVader on Jul 7, 2015 13:35:24 GMT -5
Nothing haunts me and at times its kinda funny too look back on and say did i say that. Maybe my sisters were just crazy but i have the type of sisters who would put smoke out in your face if bother here on that day.
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Frizzo the Clown
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Post by Frizzo the Clown on Jul 7, 2015 15:41:33 GMT -5
I was the Best Man aty friend's 17 or 18 years ago. I was shit at it.
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Post by RedVader on Jul 7, 2015 17:45:20 GMT -5
I can imagine it was something from the wedding singer type of best man.
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frankyt
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Post by frankyt on Jul 7, 2015 21:36:07 GMT -5
Never read a speech. Always practice, preferably with a stop watch, if needed bring a single note card with the outline or word reminders.
Take control of the room, wedding rooms are so hard to control, ask for lights if you can, get the DJ or MC to introduce you.
Start funny, end sappy, and always dance with the mothers, after all the speeches and dances and what not .
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Deexan
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Post by Deexan on Jul 9, 2015 19:20:46 GMT -5
This is my opinion as a Best Man. Unless its being asked of you too talk by your buddy and his women. Dont and dont sleep with the brides sister or any of the bride maids if had a few drinks. And best advise yet dont arrive late and most important make sure never have dated the bride. I was going to suggest doing the opposite of all those things and then writing the speech about them.
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Doomsday
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Post by Doomsday on Jul 19, 2015 15:12:25 GMT -5
You've got another week. How's the speech coming along?
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thebtskink
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Post by thebtskink on Jul 19, 2015 16:46:54 GMT -5
It's written, I haven't started to memorize it yet though. Will let you guys know how it's received.
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thebtskink
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Post by thebtskink on Jul 22, 2015 21:52:36 GMT -5
Ok memorizing is difficult. I got it timed at 3-4 minutes, but I find myself having to look down at the speech every two or three sentences to remind myself how to start the sentence.
Curse you, hyphens and semicolons!
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thebtskink
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Post by thebtskink on Jul 26, 2015 19:04:29 GMT -5
Crushed it, then proceeded to catch up drunkenness with everyone else.
No better feeling of relief then when it's finally over.
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RedStorm901
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Post by RedStorm901 on Jul 27, 2015 1:06:55 GMT -5
Congrats, glad to hear it went good.
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