The Dead Don't Die - Review Thread

Jim Jarmusch has has a long run as one of the premiere voices in American independent cinema since his 1984 breakout hit, Stranger Than Paradise.  Since then he's had a more unique career than I think a lot of people give him credit for, namely that he's unfairly factored as largely being a "quirky indie director" that makes movies about quirky individuals.  While that's somewhat true, he's also had some unique offerings in the way of redefining genre pictures and has dabbled in his own versions of both samurai and vampire movies.  So while the idea of a Jim Jarmusch zombie film may initially seem odd, it's not entirely new territory for the veteran director, as he pays homage in his own style to the late George Romero's Night of the Living Dead, even setting his film in Pennsylvania.  And he's put together a large cast filled with big names to do it, ostensibly offering a delightful group to see be eaten by zombies and subsequently become zombies themselves, which is what the false advertising would lead one to believe.  But alas, The Dead Don't Die is a stunning misfire from Jarmusch, a half-hearted attempt at being the more offbeat Shaun of the Dead and failing miserably in the process.  It's a movie that seemingly offers several storylines, only to have a whopping zero of them pay off satisfactorily and doesn't even offer much in the way of fun in the process.  It's a film that takes forever to get going, and once it does is nearly as dull as the pre-zombie proceedings before it.  It fails completely on nearly every level, and is a film that I can easily chalk up as the worst Jarmusch offering I've seen, a phrase I can't even believe I'm uttering.

The film takes place in a small town called Centerville and is policed by Chief Cliff Robertson (Bill Murray) and Ronnie Peterson (Adam Driver).  Amidst the large slew of names in the cast, these are the two we thankfully spend most of our time with and generate the most laughs, though they're largely mild at best despite strong work from both actors.  Also on the police force is Mindy Morrison (Chloe Sevigny), and working with them as an oddball coroner is Zelda Winston (Tilda Swinton).  Other members of the town include Hank (Danny Glover), Bobby (Caleb Landry Jones) who works at the hardware store and is a horror movie aficionado, Farmer Frank Miller (Steve Buscemi) who everyone in the town hates, Hermit Bob (Tom Waits) who narrates the film and lives on the town's outskirts, and a group of hipsters from out of town led by Zoe (Selena Gomez).  There are a lot of pieces on the board here, but when I say that none of these potential storylines play out or intertwine in any substantial ways I mean it.  Even worse is that some of the deaths of these characters are entirely off-screen and even worse than that, off-scene, so when we see them again they're just zombies but without any of the shock factor.  Jarmusch is attempting to pull off something eccentric here, but in actuality it's not eccentric enough nor clever enough to work as a comedy in any fashion.  As a person who loves deadpan, dry humor from Monty Python to the work of Yorgos Lanthimos, the comedy never worked for me throughout the film.  Sure, there are some mild laughs here and there, but the jokes constantly undercut themselves by rehashing them over and over until you're just sick of the repetition.  Repetition is the key word for The Dead Don't Die, as we're subjected to the same plodding elements time and time again.  Maybe the comedy and languid pacing will work for some, but most people will absolutely detest this movie.  There are no real signature sequences in either the horror or comedy variety, and you're more likely to be bored than shocked or entertained.  

Near the end of the film, Jarmusch even half-asses an attempt at putting a social message into the movie, a paltry outcry at people's reliance on materialism and products.  This isn't new territory, as Romero did this brilliantly in Dawn of the Dead pitting the action in the center of this theme; a mall.  It was a social commentary that coincided with the film's setting.  Jarmusch's "theme" isn't earned whatsoever, and feels tacked on and half-heartedly put together just like everything else in the film.  The biggest shock that The Dead Don't Die offers is how such a talented filmmaker like Jarmusch could assemble such a cast and give them absolutely nothing inspiring to do.  A zombie movie even in the vain of a comedy is hardly new territory, and when I say that Jarmusch has brought nothing compelling or new to the table with The Dead Don't Die I mean it.  This isn't a film destined for cult status or whose comedy is misunderstood in 2019 but will dazzle audiences in fifteen years.  This is a lazy, plodding, dismal disappointment from someone who we should expect much more from.  Don't be fooled by the names and hints at what this movie should be because it frankly isn't.  Whatever you've conjured up in your head, whatever you're directing in fantasy right now is much better and more inspired than this awful mess of a movie.  Shaun of the Dead this is not.  Dawn of the Dead this is not.  It's right there with Land of the Dead in terms of being an awful disaster, but it's only half as fun.

4/10