Let's settle this once and for all: DC vs. Marvel Tournament

Let the record show my like is for the Simpsons joke and not the insinuation that anything in Men in Black II is better than Batman.

The original Men in Black had a tremendous amount of world building that helped ground it against Will Smith spouting one-liners. Although I have soft spots for "it be raining black men in New York" and "you brought that tall man some flowers."




It almost felt reactionary to the animated series






Will Smith is a charming dude and they surrounded him with a good cast to play-off.

Maybe I'll create my own Learning to Love Men in Black II video essay, with blackjack and hookers. In fact, forget the video essay.

I'd play Twister with Rosario any day of the week.

Or "get coffee," if we're talking about Luke Cage.

THE FINAL VOTE:
Men in Black II
Batman is a pretty movie, but Jesus Christ is it boring in a way that has me begging for Superman IV and Return of Swamp Thing for some flavor.  Men in Black II is a crappy movie to be sure, but I'd rather be watching it's rambunctious silliness any day of the week.

The Score
Batman:  9
Men in Black II:  3



Agents J and K try to read Batman his rights, but since this is Burton Batman, Batsy just presses a button on his belt, a gun pops out of his Batmobile which shoots both of them.  Batman feels no remorse.  It was the car that did the shooting, not him.

DC:  4
Marvel:  5
Draw:  1

[SCoe=5]ROUND 11!

IN THIS CORNER[/SIZE]


Superheroes:  Michael Keaton as Bruce Wayne/Batman, Michael Gough as Alfred Pennyworth
Supervillains:  Danny DeVito as Oswald Cobblepot/The Penguin, Michelle Pfeiffer as Selina Kyle/Catwoman, Christopher Walken as Max Shreck
Civilians:  Pat Hingle as Commissioner James Gordon
Run Time:  2 Hours 6 Minutes
Director:  Tim Burton (Batman)
Writer:  Daniel Waters (Heathers, Demolition Man)
Music:  Danny Elfman (Batman, Men in Black, Spider-Man, Men in Black II)
Cinematography:  Stefan Czapsky (Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Child's Play 2, Blades of Glory)
Tomatometer:  80%
IMDB:  7
Oscars Nominated:  Best Visual Effects, Best Make-Up
Razzies Nominated:  Worst Supporting Actor - Danny DeVito
Story:  A deformed man who lives in the sewer known as "the Penguin" surfaces in Gotham, claiming to be looking for his parents.  His journey captivates the imagination of Gotham, who give him unquestioned support, while the shady Max Shreck nominates him for mayor.  Bruce Wayne sees through the Penguin's masquerade, and uses his Batman persona to expose his evil plan, but must also tangle with the secretary gone wild known as Catwoman.

Pros:  That Face to Face song is pretty good.
Cons:  Not as good as Darkman.



AND IN THIS CORNER


Superheroes:  Ben Affleck as Matt Murdock/Daredevil
Supervillains:  Michael Clarke Duncan as Richard Fisk/The Kingpin, Jennifer Garner as Elektra Natchios, Colin Farrell as Bullseye
Civilians:  Jon Favreau as Franklin "Foggy" Nelson, Joe Pantoliano as Ben Urich, David Keith as Jack Murdock, Leland Orser as Wesley Owen Welch, Erick Avari as Nikolas Natchios, Derrick O'Conner as Father Everett
Run Time:  1 Hour 43 Minutes (Theatrical Cut), 2 Hours 13 Minutes (Director's Cut)
Director:  Mark Steven Johnson (Simon Birch, When in Rome)
Writer:  Mark Steven Johnson (Simon Birch, When in Rome)
Music:  Graeme Revell (Mighty Morphin Power Rangers:  The Movie, The Crow, Sin City, Child's Play 2, Bride of Chucky, Freddy vs. Jason, Pitch Black, The Chronicles of Riddick)
Cinematographer:  Ericson Core (The Fast and the Furious)
Tomatometer:  44%
IMDB:  5.3
Razzies Won:  Worst Actor - Ben Affleck (also for Gigli and Paycheck)
Story:  Blind lawyer by day, masked vigilante named Daredevil with superhuman senses by night, Matt Murdock leads a campaign to put a stop to the mysterious crime boss Kingpin on both fronts, just as a romance blossoms between him and socialite Elektra Natchios.  When the Kingpin hires an assassin named Bullseye to perform a hit on Elektra's father, Elektra blames Daredevil for the crime, and vows vengeance on the masked man.

Pros:  I like Evanescence, you assholes.
Cons:  Led to a pretty bad divorce between Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner.



FIGHT!

I like elements of Daredevil. Michael Clarke Duncan is pretty great in that role.

But I vote Batman Returns

Gross.



Batman Returns, easy. I'll post the video again if I have to.

What video?

This was supposed to be for patreon ONLY!